It’s all about direction babes

Babes is my new ironic word du jour but I use it way too often that people think that I’m for real using it. Not
so babes. I like to use it when I’m feeling like a trash bag so if you compare the frequency of it’s use
to how trashy I’m feeling then I must be pure trash baggery 90% of the time.
The spring 2012 shows are soon and I’m excited. In the lead up it’s quite a good time to log on to Style.com or Vogue and look over the winter collections but I feel like I’ve been seeing them for months now. Like the Prada collection which I’m soooo over. If I have to see another shaggy plastic fish scale coat I’ll just.. I don’t know. I’ll probably just cross my arms and make a displeased hrmph sound. I didn’t hate that collection but Prada always get so much magazine coverage that the clothes become grating. And those stupid fucking hats. Infuriating. I dunno, that collection is everywhere at the moment and it doesn't deserve the coverage it’s getting unlike their last spring show which was amazeballs.

Here's my round up of what I'm looking out for at this seasons shows...

Balmain-Olivier Rousteing
Since Christophe Decarnin left the house due to health reasons Olivier Rousteing is now the head designer. I’d like to think that he’ll forge a new direction for the house but I don’t think it’s gonna happen. I mean, where will Emanuelle Alt get her pants from? Certainly not Balenciaga.

Left: Olivier Rousteing. Hnnng. Right: Carine Roitfeld and Emmanuelle Alt in zebra print Balmain skinnys. 

Sophmore Mugler show
As head creative director, Nicola Formichetti admitted he’s not a designer but I have a feeling he believes this gives him an edge and a freedom that trained designers don’t have. There’s no doubt that he’s talented and perhaps he’ll bring Mugler to a new, much younger audience (with a little help from Lady Gaga of course) but what he's doing isn't fashion, nor does it have to be. Mugler is a different animal now and is more of a product than it used to be under the creative direction of Thierry Mugler. Instead of feathered dresses and motorcycle bodices it’s mesh tops and mint flares (which I’ve commented on before. Le meow). Sure I think the new direction is disappointing but at the same time what the house stood for is mostly forgotten and most consumers have little knowledge of what Mugler was like (except for people I guess who went to fashion shows in the 80’s. How amazing right?).

     From this............................................................................to this. Yeah, it's $6000. Get yours now.


Chloé-ClareWaight-Keller
So Chloé threw out Hannah Macgibbon after a few seasons and brought in Clare Waight-Keller. CWK was at Pringle of Scotland which is a nice enough label but Chloé has a cool factor that Pringle doesn’t so presumably CWK jumped at the opportunity. I’m guessing Chloé CEO Geoffroy de la Bourdonnaye wants to bring the brand back into the fold because it’s slipped since Phoebe Philo’s departure. Though Macgibbon produced some great stuff it never reached the realms of say, the Paddington bag or the knockout dresses Philo designed.

What's with these black and white studio portraits of designers? 

Dior-Bill Gaytten.
More fun? More clowns? After Gaytten’s Miami movement train wreck I don’t know where it’s going to go. I’m kind of hoping for more train wreckage because it’s highly entertaining. And it throws into sharp relief how talented Galliano is and what he was capable of doing (even when he was apparently high and drunk).
Galliano always talked about how the couture shows informed the ready to wear collections. Certain shapes or colours would spill over from couture to ready to wear. I always got the impression that he used this as a defense for couture. Something to ensure its relevancy. I wonder if Gaytten will do the same.

Tootle. Exactly as I remember it

And bon voyage Christophe

Christophe Decarnin has stepped down or was fired as head designer of Balmain. Initially it was thought he left due to depression but apparently he clashed with his boss over the direction of the brand.

It is thought that stylist Melanie Ward will step in as his replacement so very little will change which is fitting considering the tried and true formula of the brand. Skinny pant + military jacket + torn t-shirt = Balmain.

Fall 2011, his final collection

Maybe he could take over at Cacharel. Or Dior. Oh the options. He should probs take some meds and chill out for a bit though.

So as a tribute to Decarnin's fine work I've done a little retrospective of his sluttiest dresses from all of his collections. And as a little fashion brain teaser I've put in one look that isn't by Decarnin. See if you can spot it.

Me Gusta

Above: Celine. Georjizz

Oh Katie, stop

Above: Comme Des Garcons. There was even some bewb in this show! Above CDG is Viktor & Rolf. 

Above: Soft painterly Cacharel. Above Cacharel is Carven. 

Hola! (that's Spanish for hello)

Well fashion week is coming to an end and on Wednesday I'm taking off to South America for 3 weeks. I don't believe I'll be blogging in that time. I think I'll just be a bloated disgusting tourist experiencing the rich culture of Argentina, eating steak and drinking way too much wine.

Unfortunately I don't have time to riff on all the collections from Paris so far. It's been quite a week. Not an article goes by without someone mentioning Galliano or how orgasmic Haider Ackermann is. I have a feeling he may be the chosen one to helm Dior.
Christophe Decarnin has a major case of the sads and wasn't at Balmain, though you wouldn't know it by looking at the clothes. Same old pants, t-shirt, jacket combo. I actually liked it, the ikat details.

There's also been whispers that Hannah Macgibbon may be out at Chloe. Now that would not surprise me. Some people dig her quietly glamorous clothes but I find them a little too quiet. A little too vacant and neither here nor there.

Phoebe Philo makes my panties ping yet again. I know some of you guys are like fuck minimalism but I just can't help myself. The leather, the chiffon, the rough fabrics, the new doctor's bag. She's so talented and knows exactly what she wants.

 Cedric Charlier at Cacharel just gets better with each season. For fall there was plenty of layering and expert colours. I love this collection very much. Sorely underrated.

Also, Carven, amazeballs.

Waaah, I wanna stay up all night and write reviews.

So what do I think after 4 weeks of New York, London, Milan and Paris?

Fuck This, I'll DIY

Balmain t-shirt, £938 or USD$1426 or AUD$1551

Balmain can blow me. I'm gonna go to the army surplus store then get a bic razor. Total cost $5

The Mower review of Balmain

Is she serious? Could her nose be further up his ass?

Maybe that's what fashion wants right now. A refusal to accept reality and grab a hold of anything pompous, outrageous, sparkly.
A bold shoulder does not a signature make.
Fuck, it reads as though he went completely against convention and is giving women a whole new perspective on how to dress. No he fucking didn't. He did what he's been doing since he got there.
Yes, she gave him some barbs but they were minimal and didn't impact on the overall review.
Yes there's a trajectory right now of hot, souped up clothes (Altuzarra's Tom Ford Homage) thanks to Decarnin but it reeks of bullshit.
I'm done.



Oh hello. Don't you do one of these every season?

Oh, you do
And again
And again

BALMAIN SPRING 2010

Christophe Decarnin, head designer of Balmain now for a few seasons has tapped into something other designers seem unable to do: Sexy. Well, it's not cold sexy like Gucci, there's a warmth to the clothes that appeals to people. Have women been yearning for the moment to arrive where they can dress like a slut and justify their look because it cost thousands of dollars? (ps, no one has to ‘justify’ their look, especially to me of all people).
It’s a very interesting change in fashion that Decarnin has set and I can’t for the life of me figure it out. He’s designing provocative, short, sexy, sequined dresses. He’s also designing swollen-shouldered military jackets in denim and it’s selling out. All of it.
There’s also been a recent comparison between Balmain and Balenciaga. Not a comparison of design but of stature. Admittedly, no one is getting as much hype as Balmain and it’s been hyped by customers and not the press. The press are merely reporting on the buzz, the waiting lists for those $2000 jeans and $4000 entry-level tuxedo jackets.
The collections themselves are cool but once they come off the runway and onto real people, well, they look fucking stupid. Only the rich and middle aged can afford these clothes but only the young and emaciated can pull it off. I can't remember where I read it (and I'm kicking myself because it was a fucking great article) but the author was saying something to the effect that some people don’t want to look demure, they want to wear their worth in crystals and sequins.

So for spring from what I've read, Balmain is getting rave reviews for a completely new direction. The 80's references are apparently gone and now we have an urban disco jungle warrior. Sounds like yawn on paper but it's not. The Balmain silhouette was still there (unbuttoned jacket with super-sized shoulders, slouchy top, skinny pants cropped above the ankle and a high-heeled boot), as were military jackets, this time with silver glo-mesh dripping from the shoulders. 80's references gone? Fuck no. Virtually every piece was a colour variation on army surplus green except for the glo-mesh dresses in silver and gold and the leather pieces which came in black. The boots were beautiful and it was nice to see someone design a realistic heel for a change. A top was sequined and layered with glo-mesh to resemble a camouflage scrim, the irony being you won't blend into anything in these clothes

PUCCI SPRING 2010

Matthew Williamson has left the house. Thank god, I really don't like what he does anyway.
So now they've got Peter Dundas (formerly of Ungaro) at the helm. I looked at this collection and I could just imagine the CEO in a meeting with Dundas.
CEO- We're looking for something, youthful, sexy, edgy. Kinda like, oh gee, what's that label? Ah yes, Balmain. Just do Balmain.
Dundas- Yes sir.
I dunno, this is just another Milan collection where I can't fault the creativity, the workmanship, the sheer work that goes into making a collection etc but it's just so...blah. Like, yeah, you did a sequined mini dress. AMAZE ME GOD-DAMMIT! So now Pucci will be the next hot label. The feathered, tassled dress pictured will be on every red carpet in a town near you.
ps, How hot is model Rose Cordero? She's so Grace Jones.

STYLE DOSSIER: JENNIFER CONNELLY

This month's Style Dossier covers Jennifer Connelly. Any child of the 80's knows her from The Labyrinth and any child of the 90's knows her from Requiem For A Dream.
She is muse to Nicolas Ghesquiere of Balenciaga so naturally she wears a lot of his outfits but she's also sported Givenchy and Chloe to premieres and other red carpet events. There's not many style boo boos with this star but there's a few.










How do get your hair like that?
A piece of cake Jennifer, a little gel, mousse and hairspray